GOD IS GREAT

Today has been a very productive day. We've accomplished so much around the house. God is great! Still wondering but confident that God already has ministry and home already layed out the way he sees fit for us.

In my reading today I was again reminded of telling what Jesus does in your life. Seems I run across that continually throuout scripture. Today I read about the Samaritan woman at the well, when Jesus told her about her life and about the living water. John 4:28 "Then leaving her jar, the woman went back to the town and said to the people, 'come, see a man who told me everything I ever did. Could this be the Christ?'" vs. 39 "Many of the Samaritans from the town believed in him because of the woman's testimony, 'He told me everything I ever did.'...And because of his words many more became believers." We must remember that when we share our testimony about what Jesus has done in our life that it does reach the hearts of others. As the song says "This is an emergency - There are tears of the saints, for the lost and unsaved, their crying for them, 'come back home'" I pray that yours and my testimonies will resinate in the hearts of others. God will use what he has done in our lives to effect others for the Kingdom. I know for a fact that what I have gone through God will use to further his kingdom. Keep your heart open to Jesus and daily ask him to come in and fill you.

I was telling Tim this morning that so much in our life seems like the impossible. Then I smiled and remembered that God loves the impossible. (that is the impossible in our human eyes) This song that I've put on my blog was given to me by a young man named Brian. He said he listens to it at certain times in life... well, listen to it. You'll know when!

I'm getting excited to see what's next.

SHINE

Somehow I feel at a loss for words. I'm trying not to allow the enormity of the unknown, in every aspect of our life, get in the way of the truth that I know. The truth that I KNOW beyond a shadow of a doubt that the Lord has everything in place and is working things out for his plan to unfold. My job now is to be obedient to his leadings. To praise him in the midst of everything unknown and rejoice in the future plans that he will unfold, in his time. That is the truth that I know. I was just sharing this with Tim, but also shared "I know that God has us but I cannot gloss over the fact that I'm scared too." I don't want to pretend that I've got it all together. Reality is that I daily have to call out to Jesus for his strength. I cannot imagine going through this without that.

So we pack - again! I don't know if God will ever "settle" us in one place. I thought we could have been here until we retire. Good lesson in not making our own plans.

I was just telling Tim that blogging today was kind of blah. Then these words came out. "Somehow I feel just me, I don't want to be just me but Christ in me. It is the Spirit of Christ that I want to shine through. Even though I know I have the Spirit of Christ in me I don't want just me to be what I and others see, but the Spirit of Christ that is within me, that is what I want to shine." I stopped and knew I needed to share this. I can do all I want in this world and in our stuff in life but if I am doing this being just me, everything will be fruitless. It is when we allow the Spirit of Christ to shine through us that we will shine. May that Spirit shine in me and in each of you. Remember, if you don't know Jesus, just stop what you are doing, ask Jesus to come into your heart (he did die on the cross to take away your sins, all of them.) The Spirit of Christ will come. That is a promise. If you know Jesus but just don't "feel it" - cry out to him and ask for his presence within you. In you and around you.

May the peace of Christ be with each of us.

BROKENNESS

I talked yesterday to a woman who is so incredibly broken. She is filled with so much pain. I could listen and share with her Jesus. Jesus came for the brokenhearted. He came for the sick not the healthy. He came to set people free. He wants to just love all over you. Psalm 103 says "Praise the Lord, O my soul...who redeems your life from the pit and crowns you with love and compassion, who satisfies your desires with good things..." This is the Jesus who loves each of us, this is the Jesus who died on the cross for your sins and mine. That pit you feel like your in - you don't have to stay there. Call out to Jesus and he will save you. That is a promise.

We prepare to move - where? I don't know, but we will pack up the house now and trust the Lord to take care of the rest. I'm actually getting excited to see what God is going to do.

Recently the Lord connected me with an old friend from seminary days. (we met 15 years ago) Our conversations reiterate the need for pastors and their families to be loved on. I heard stories of friends of ours from seminary days who are no longer in the ministry after being burned so badly. There is a need out there and it cannot be ignored any longer.

Thought for the day - think about your pastor, his wife and his children. Now remember that God has called them to be the shepherd of your church. Love all over them, support them in prayer big time. Don't criticize them but accept them for who God has made them. Hebrews 13:17 "Obey your leaders and submit to their authority. They keep watch over you as men who must give an account. Obey them so that their work will be a joy, not a burden, for that would be of no advantage to you." If you consider your pastor and his family friends, real friends, then when challenges arise in the church and you find yourself disagreeing with him on issues - remember that true friendship comes with respect, even when you disagree. Then remember the scripture above and pray for your pastor and submit to the authority that God has placed in him. Then encourage and support him. (As long as it is in line with scripture.)

God's peace!!!!

APPOINTED TIME

Psalm 102:13 says "You will arise and have compassion on Zion, for it is time to show favor to her; the appointed time has come."

This scripture seemed to shine for me this morning. I wondered in my readings this morning what the Lord wanted to reveal to me and I came back to this verse. So we will be obedient to the Lord and make some big steps. We have had a sense that the time has come in our life - for what exactly we are not for sure, but we are sure that we want the Lord to direct our path, not us. "Many are the plans in a man's heart, but it is the Lord's purpose that prevails." Prov. 19:21. I can do all I want to hang on to the securities of this world, but those things are not lasting. Only Jesus will remain the same, only Jesus will never fail me. Set aside my plans and my thoughts Lord, may I daily remember that you have NEVER FAILED TO TAKE CARE OF ME.

God has done so much shaping in me in the more recent years. I know for certain that he will use the fire that I have been through to minister to others. Being open and vulnerable on this blog has been a huge step but one that God has blessed. If you are reading this and are facing uncertain times stop and close your eyes, mediate on Jesus, open up your heart to him, tell him how you feel, ask him to fill you with his presence. He will....he loves his children and wants us to come to him. "Come to me all you who are weary and burdened and I will give you rest." That is a promise.

I have been so guilty of trying to carry it on my own. I give it to Jesus, then I pick it up again the next day...sound familiar? I am so grateful that Jesus loves me through it, he is patient with me; yet I need daily to lay it down before him, daily come to him.

I am so grateful that the God of the universe is the one carrying me today and tomorrow.

DELIGHT

"Delight yourself in the Lord and he will give you the desires of your heart."

This was scripture shared with us tonight by some friends. Words layed on his heart to share with us. It was such a blessing to be together, the four of us, sharing life and Jesus with each other. Praying together - powerful prayer together. I love that the Lord has put them in our path and look forward to more times shared together. I love being together with friends and spending so much time sharing about our faith walk, our struggles and triumphs. I love hearing about how God is working in their life, growing from what God is doing with them, listening and not judging - and seeing myself in what God is working out in them.

Jesus wants us to be real - to be open about ourselves - share life with each other - lift one another up - and not judge one another. It is a daily walking it out for I know that I fail in so many of these ways. Soften my heart Lord every day to see everyone through your eyes - as you see them. May I delight in YOU!

CRUNCH TIME

Ever had a time in your life when you felt like it was crunch time. Decisions had to be made...etc. and it just felt like crunch time? Seems we are facing some of this now.

I had a dream last night, actually early morning - we had moved to St. Louis, and I was picking up Angela from her new school. (she was maybe 3rd grade in the dream) She came out holding my hand and bouncing happily. I asked her how school was and she cheerfully said "it was great mom." I woke up to the words, concluding my dream - "I will never leave you or forsake you." This could only have been a reminder that in the midst of big decisions God is right there. Lord, help me to stand strong in this assurance. He has the best in mind for his children; what he knows is the best for them, not what we think is the best.

My mind is a fog because I am tired. So instead of trying to write more I think I'll just go to sleep.

FLYING FREE

So I don't usually post twice in one day but here goes. This morning I decided to go on a bike ride. I took off and headed down 26 mile to the Macomb Orchard Trail. As I was riding down the trail, a smooth and straight path, I had this urge to just let go of the handlebars. I use to ride no handed all the time when I was a kid. I steadied the handle bars, balanced myself, then let go with hands in the air. I felt like I was flying and in that time sensed the words "we will soar on wings of Eagles, we will run and not grow weary, we will walk and not be faint." I felt a freeness of flying and it was so cool. When God gives us those moments it's so important not to forget them. If I close my eyes I can still feel the freeness of flying.

When we were at a lake this past weekend we saw a hawk soaring above the lake. It kept flying around and around. We noticed that it didn't flap it's wings the entire time we were watching it. That freedom of flight, which appears to have little effort,, is what our life with Christ is meant to be. If I listen to Jesus invitation to just climb aboard and soar with him doing the flying I can just relax for the ride. I can take it all in, breath in his fresh air and wait for the glorious mountain that I will land on. I may fly around mountainous areas that seem a bit scary at times but we will come out on the other side with him still carrying me.

Just close your eyes and enjoy the ride...........(by the way, I was excited to find out when I got home that I rode 6.7 miles, record for me)

OUR STORY

The title for my blog address is quite simple. Christmas 2007 I received a gift from my husband; it was a journal and it was titled "I hope you dance." Know that it was that year before when we finally took a couple sessions of couples dance classes together. I had always wanted to do this. So this journal was to be "our story". We would take turns writing in it and when we are done we place it on the end table on the other side of the bed, thus indicating a new entry has been made and it's the next person's turn. We've had times when we faithfully wrote back and forth and other times where one of us just forgot for a while. Either way, we always pick it back up again. So much of our life these past couple of years is written in "our story".

God is the one who writes our story. Sometimes we even forget and think that our life story is "ours", not God's. I want to remember that God is the one writing my life story. If it is me writing the story I will miss our on the great miracles that God wants to do in my life. The miracle of Mary and the virgin birth - wow - God wants to do miracles in my life too. I realize today that I limit God. Big mistake. Lord, open my mind to see the limitless power that you have in my life, to let down the wall that I put up, thinking you will only go so far. Lord, there is no limit to what you can do and what you want to do in my life. May I reach for the skies, draw power and strength from you and see the endless possibilities with you leading the way. There is nothing that my God cannot do. When it looks impossible; it is then when we see the miracle.

WONDERING

So I've spent today doing an aweful lot of wondering - ok, some worrying was mixed in there too. All about what the future is to hold for us. As I was again reminded in my scripture reading today of the Israelites grumbling, I felt very convicted of doing the same today. Grumbling inside, picking up some unforgiveness and worrying about what to do next. Makes me think of the song "who am I, that the Lord of all the earth, would care to know my name, would care to feel my hurt; who am I the the one who calms the sea, would calm the storm in me." Seems that whenever I go through these spots in life I am usually convicted of something that God needs to work out in my life. Sometimes I want to ignore what God is trying to show me, but it ends up that I have no choice but to listen to his voice.

Jesus is so loving that he would die for me. He will continue to come after me even when I am being a putz. Thank you Jesus for your kindness. Romans 2 says "your kindness leads me to repentance." I know that he is working on me, being kind to me and bringing me to repentance for ever doubting him. Being in his will is where I want to be; lest I forget that being in my own will would be a mess. The following song is so beautiful and comforting. May it bring peace to our soul; remembering that he is good and he is kind.

Happy 20th today to beautiful daughter Emily. May the Lord pour all over you his blessings and love. May you know deep in your heart his love for you and mine as well. I remember when you were just born your big wide awake eyes. We could see the Spirit of Christ in you right away. Live in his love and power.

I AM LOVED SO MUCH

This day has brought much and it's only 10 am.

First, to be quite honest, I am fighting off some PMS. You men don't understand, but you women do. Just a bit tight this morning.

Second, I made sure I did a work out this morning. The 30 Day Shred. 20 minutes, I made it through.

Third, it's our 26th wedding anniversary and we get to spend it in the same place we did last year, when we renewed our wedding vows. Awesome celebration that was!

And Fourth, and powerful to me today was in my scripture reading this morning. I am in the book of Judges for my old testament reading. Chapter 2 and 3. This is what came alive for me - numerous times I read "the Israelites did evil in the eyes of the Lord; they forgot the Lord their God and served other gods." Then they were basicly in captivity to the King(s) for years - "But when they cried out to the Lord, he raised up for them a deliverer, ______." They fall so far away from God, they cry out to him in their trouble (which they brought on themselves), and the Lord sends a deliverer to them. This happened many times too - I felt this overwhelming sense of love from God. No matter how I fail he WILL NEVER LEAVE ME. No matter how far I fall down he will just keep coming back to me, and back to me again and again. He does not want to stop pursuing me.

I will not stop calling out to the Lord for help. He will not stop coming after me. His love for me is so huge I cannot even begin to fathom it. Smile big today - you are loved so amazingly much.

Side note - Tim just got back from golfing with the brother pastors and had his best golf game ever. :)

WHAT CAN I BRING TO YOU?

Life continues to bring about many changes for me. In August Denise and Mike leave for 11 months and Emily is moving out. These are good things as I want my girls to be independant women of God. But to be honest - it's hard! My girls are my best friends and our relationships are awesome. An answered prayer that is for sure. I knew a few years ago that very quickly they would be gone from our home. Of course I couldn't expect them to live with me forever - God has a big plan for them and they need to pursue His plan for their lives. I feel so humbled that God would see to provide me such awesome friends in my girls. I am sure that I will continue to see Emily frequently for laundry duty here and some awesome God conversations.

There is nothing that I can even begin to bring to Jesus, simply my gratitude and my heart. I am nothing, yet he thinks of me as something so amazing and great. He continues to pursue me and love me even when I fall down. Prayer time is awesome - just laying down and being with him. Laying my own agenda aside is when I can really hear him speak. What do you want me to pray for Lord? Not what I want, but to seek everything about you; understanding that you watch over every step that I take. You WILL watch over the girls as they pursue the life that you have for them. May they always seek your face, coming to you daily in prayer and in the word.

We've got our passports - don't know why we need them, but in obedience to God we have them.

Jesus, you make me smile:)

STEADFAST FAITH

128 Family members gathered together these last few days for quite the family reunion. (another one) All the way to the fifth generation. It is so awesome to gather to worship together and reconnect after two years. We are a family that gathers for devotions, worship and of course the traditional basketball tourney and softball game. The younger generation is taking over in the areas of sports. (Although Tim pounded one home run; made him feel 23 again; until he ran the bases. haha)

Uncle Herm (probably 85) shared some words. He lives in Canada and has been a pastor his entire life. I loved his openess as he was honest about himself, areas that God needed to work on during his life, ways that he failed...I hugged him and thanked his for being "real". He said that it's not always easy to write about it. I believe that being "real" is what we can relate to the most. He and his son and grandaughter traveled from Vancouver first by bus, then 44 hours on the train. (son Richard does not like to fly) It was amazing to me the effort that was made to come to family camp.

This was our theme for the week. "In the same way your Father in heaven is not willing that any of these little ones should be lost. Matt. 18:14 Yes, we actually have Bickel Camp T-shirts, this was the picture. I love our family! We focussed on passing down Jesus to the next generation...what a blessing to be a part of this. Fourth generation in-law, Randy started us off with our kick-off bible study and Tim finished us up yesterday morning. Our MC for camp was in-law cousin Keith. He never ceases to make us laugh, giving prizes of "Bickel" potato chips to the participants of this camp's game "I am not smarter than an in-law". We laugh and we cry together.

So we pass on the faith to those around us; to the next generation. It is because of grandma and grandpa Bickel that this family camp is still going on after 51 years.

Now we get back to life again. Still wondering what our next step is to be. Still waiting..........Lord, open our eyes to see clearly where you would have us to go. I thought of us being in God's will the other day and was reminded of Noah. God gave Noah clear instructions to build this boat, how he must have been laughed at. Yet he continued to build despite those around not believing. Lord, give me this faith to steadfastly move despite the world and others around. As you reminded Joshua "Be strong and courageous, do not be terrified for the Lord your God goes with you; he will never leave you or forsake you."

TELL THE STORY

So this morning I am sitting writing my blog at a family reunion. I will post this when I get home but I don’t like going too long without blogging.

Family reunions are great. Relationships change, cousins grow up and get married, have children of their own. Some move far away, some are in transition, some are very close, others are not. That is the way it is with families. Not one is perfect. Yet God moves in each of our lives. He guides each of us the way that we need.

Psalm 89:1 says “I will sing of your great love forever; with my mouth I will make your faithfulness known through all generations.” This is the core of our family reunions -to make known His faithfulness through the generations. We will continue reunion with about 125 people, including generations even further. God is faithful with those who commit their ways to him. We should remember with our own family the importance of telling the faithfulness and love of Christ in our lives to those around us. We should remember to listen with open hearts to those who share, understanding that they are sharing “their story.”

We do not know what tomorrow holds but we know who holds our tomorrow. In our job/ministry transition we must daily remember God’s faithfulness to us. The mighty deeds that he has done in our life, his provision when we do not see what is next, the powerful freedom that he has given us in many areas of our personal lives are not to be forgotten. When I begin to doubt and become afraid, he is right there, all I have to do is call on him and he hears and reminds me “I’ve got it”!

What is the story of God’s faithfulness in your life?

CONVERSATIONS ABOUT GOD

Yesterday was so neat. Tim and I stopped and visited some dear friends. We haven't had the opportunity in a number of years to sit and visit. We arrived at lunch time. The four of us, their son, and their daughter sat at the kitchen table talking about God. I love the Hogenmillers and their passion for Jesus. I loved visiting and having our conversation revolve around his work in our lives. It is such a blessing to be around people like this. I realized after we left how much we have changed since we lived near them. Being rooted deeper in Christ is so awesome and I wouldn't trade any of the fire that we went through to get there. If God ever brought us near each other again I believe that we would spend a lot of time together seeking the face of Jesus and praying together. Discussing scripture together and hearing awesome God stories makes me smile.:)

It is relaxing sitting here in the hotel blogging while Tim prepares his message for the wedding this afternoon. The sound of little children's voices outside the door is cute at the moment, but the hotel is definitely not very sound proof as during the early hours we could hear everyone waking up. We were not ready to wake up!!!!!!!!!!

We woke up and walked across the street to Walmart, took the flash drive in that had a couple of family pictures on it. I went to the automatic picture machine to make some copies. Not too many, a couple 8x10, a couple 5x7 and about 11 4x6. Went to check out and she said "that will be $34." WHAT - $34 (no, I didn't yell at the cashier) I didn't even think to look at the prices, I was expecting around $12 or so. Make sure you do 1 hour photo, that would have been 1/2 the price. We prayed that God would provide the $34.

Jesus, may your Spirit fill us this day. Be all over us, be all over our family, be all over the wedding. You make me smile:)

WE ARE LISTENING

These past few days have been soooo busy. Tim and I are going to a wedding. (He is also officiating) It will be nice to see some old and dear friends. We are also preparing for two family reunions. Much preperation involved and I am tired and ready for bed.

My Psalm for the day was pretty depressing. Usually David sums up his difficult times with confidence in God. Not today, Psalm 88 ends with "You have taken my companions and loved ones from me; the darkness is my closest friend." I was glad when Tim shared with me later some scripture that he had read that brought encouragement. Yet as I write those words from Psalm 88 down on my blog I am reminded of times when I have felt that way. David was honest about how he was feeling; we should be too. God knows the pain that we feel, share it with him. I am glad that I don't feel the darkness like I have in the past. God does bring us through the trials and he will continue to. The hard times will never be gone in our lives, but they become less hard the more we rely on Jesus.

Easier said than done sometimes, right? It helps to just get alone somewhere with God. I like to close my eyes with some praise music playing and focus on Jesus being right next to me. I love to ask the Holy Spirit to fill me deep within my soul, in me, and surround me. When I ask this I can always feel him with me. It's powerful. Remember, "draw near to me and I will draw near to you." Hebrews

Jesus, you are so awesome, fill me so full with your presence. Fill my Timothy with your confidence and your guidance. Speak clearly to him and direct our path. We are listening.

A NEW DAY

This is the day that the Lord has made we will rejoice and be glad in it.

I've been reminded in various ways to live today not tomorrow. Not that I don't already know that. Scripture says, "do not worry about tomorrow..." It rained last night and I look out in my back yard and notice how incredibly green everything is. God is so cool how he chose green for the trees and the grass. Such a cool, calming color. The birds are singing and the flowers just outside the windows grew to about a foot above the window before they bloomed. Just look around you, listen, and you can understand when scripture talks about everything praising God, from the mountains to the snow to the trees and the animals. Now if the creation we look around and see sings praise to him shouldn't I/we not do the same? We are his greated and loved creation. We were created to love him, to praise him and to live our lives for him. Not for ourselves in seeking to make things in our life work out for our best, but to seek in our life how we can honor our heavenly Father.

Make me an instrument of praise to you Lord. May our life and anything that we face bring praise and honor to you. May our testimony be a testimony of you and bring you glory.

Psalm 98:7-8 "Let the sea resound, and everything in it, the world and all who live in it. Let the rivers clap their hands, let the mountains sing together for joy; let them sing before the Lord."